Custody Arrangements Made Easy
No matter how much you and your spouse disagree about divorce issues, you should make every effort to protect your children from as much stress and upheaval as possible. When you place your children first, you may be able to set aside your differences enough that you can create a fair and easy-to-use parenting plan. For some some tips on a making some child custody and visitation plans, read on before talking with your divorce lawyer.
1. Try to approach issues that are likely to be less contentious first; that will set the tone for all future decisions and make it easier when the time comes for those tougher choices. For example, most parents can agree on things like where the child is to spend school vacations.
2. While you just naturally want to spend as much time as possible with your child, don't make any custody or visitation plans without careful consideration of your other commitments. Look at your current work and personal obligations and don't over-commit yourself. It's much better to commit to less time and fulfill those promises than to constantly disappoint your child.
3. While you are looking at schedules, observe your child's present activities and make an effort to adhere as closely as possible to them. Kids of all ages thrive with routines, so keep that in mind when making your decisions about where the child spends time, particularly school afternoons and nights. Focus on making your plans as easy to remember and as simple as you can.
4. Plan for emergencies by ensuring that you have a plenty of contingency plans. Bad weather days, sick days, car break downs ,and more can occur just as if you were still a couple; except that now you may be the one counted on to make that school run. Enlist your ex, your neighbors, and your relatives to be on call for emergencies, and don't neglect to adjust your contact lists at your child's school to ensure a smooth pick up.
5. You may want to listen to anything your child says about their custody and visitation preferences, but whatever you do, avoid trying to place what is essentially an adult responsibility on them by having them make the decisions. The older the child, the more input they might have, but remember that, as parents, you likely know best.
6. Make some plans to be on the same page with each other as you deal with your busy child's life. Shared calendaring systems (like Google calendar) and apps for scheduling can help ensure that you both keep up-to-date on that school play, soccer practices, and sleepovers with friends.
